And I really hope thats not the cause, but if the OP is a person of color, there is a possibility that this is a contributing factor especially if the coworker is not having issues with anyone elses scent profile. . Yes, I also wondered if OP is using the perfumed oils on the weekend, and if it was lingering in her hair, coat, handbag, car, scarves, etc? I also let them know Im ever so grateful they are taking my health concerns seriously. I bought a bottle of Caress body wash when I was in college because it was on sale. I finally had to write up one worker who insisted on spraying perfume in the office. I find it appalling. yeah, Ive always associated with stoner culture more than hippies or POC to be honest. I wanted to give the coworker the benefit of the doubt at first. I have to agree . It could be that the coworker hasnt realized they have the issue, not our delightful LW. Business Etiquette & Workplace Manners on Burping and Sniffing. If not I would actually quit over this. If it is bullying, then standing up for your right not to be verbally abused may help. Haha, Im not sure if this is a good idea, but I love it. Advertising on our site helps support our mission. Advertising on our site helps support our mission. Have someone independently walk in and see what they smell where. If its that severe, then the person who has that reaction needs to be figuring out their own way to avoid things, not putting the entire burden of it on their coworkers. Confront Another Employee Who Is Bad-Mouthing Me. to me and I find it nauseating. I actually find the smell of patchouli very pleasant, but I do recognize that a lot of people have negative associations with it. Im not sure the OP really can win with this co-worker. Maybe ask another coworker or friend if she can smell it. Suggest management isolate her if living in the world is too much for her once accommodations have already been made and she wont. The fastest, simplest and quietest way to communicate is through a chat tool, however, you've got to set some expectations around how it's used. Thrown everything in the washer when I get home, may not wash it than and there, and take a shower before heading to bed. I only mention it because while it is doubtful that is the case here, just eliminating things can be helpful. Idk why but he always sniffs. And all of her clothes, even immediately after laundering, smell exactly like her perfume, which is interesting because the detergent on its own it quite strongly scented. I wouldn't blame anyone for dunking their heads into a basket of feral man meat hammocks. There are other ways to work this outside besides demanding that OP never comes into contact with anything remotely scented. I was thinking about this, too, but I havent gotten any promotion, raise or recognition since we started working on this project. Im a smoker, and I have been for several decades now. It's much like giving small children a new toy to play. It's best left up to the manager. Theres a way to deal with this coworker head on, which involves a level of comfort with direct confrontation that not everyone has. In the regions I have lived in, dirty hippy meant white, pretty much every time. You can have the honey-glazed salmon on a cedar plank. The exaggerated sniffing, the pointed remarks about patchouli (which definitely smells NOTHING like lemon)those arent the behaviors of someone who is genuinely trying to solve an unfortunate issue. This requires a somewhat herculean effort of open windows, incense, scented candles, oil burners, and oil diffusers, plus regular cleaning of the litter box with high quality litter. If co-worker said that the scented oils give her migraines or make her feel like shes going to vomit, I think thats a different level than just saying I dont like that scent. incense? Sniffing is a little less offensive, as people with colds or allergies frequently sniff throughout the day but do not do so to be rude. Dont wear it to work is really reasonable, but asking someone to never use it is not like you said, there are other scents that are also hated by some. Has your boyfriend gone to an ENT? Here we go 1. If the colleague continues, especially in a loud, unrestrained manner, consider making a complaint to your manager or human resources department. Boss talked to her, and she insisted she hadnt sprayed anything.but I had 2 witnesses who said she did. I love lOccitane products, they somehow avoid scent allergies for me. Thank you! Wow. I remember wanting to scoop my eyeballs out in classes or long, multi-hour exams with chronic snifflers, even though I have a chronic low-grade sinus infection Ive struggled to treat my entire life. This is definitely on this co-worker. Im guessing no, otherwise the coworker would have an office reputation for being sensitive. If you're fighting a cold and are forced to sniffle repeatedly, consider stopping at the drug store for something that will relieve your symptoms. But it does have so many negative associations and smells so strongly to people that I wouldnt wear it to work anyway. It was just easier to ask me not to let it bother me and keep asking me to try new products and deal with her myself. Yes, this. I inhale the mindblowing smells and sandals I also lick, but only the inner soles where the pretty feet have met the . My mom says the same thing about Caress body wash. Where a light scented spray of perfume or body mist or even deodorant will fade away throughout the day, patchouli oil is there forever. This may have already been mentioned, but the co-worker said the scent was bothering her. Bothering her as in I dont like that scent or bothering her as in I get debilitating migraines and cannot work due to that scent? There is a big difference. My friend actually did his dissertation on this topic. if you have to entirely eradicate any scent you may have and completely alter your lifestyle in your own home and on your own time to accommodate someone else thats pretty unreasonable. For real I understand if people *like* the smell of Febreeze, but seriously, its not some magical odor-disapperating powder, so dont act like its automatically preferable to any other strong scent. Most people are more than willing to do reasonable things for their coworkers comfort, but it sounds like the OPs coworker is the type thats totally unreasonable. I do wear my perfumes on the weekend still, but I generally wear business casual clothes (which live in my closet) to work and casual clothes (which live in my dresser) on the weekend. She likes the idea and often makes it a part of our sexlife. I think because OP has gone to such great lengths to be accommodating, folks are trying to help her ensure that theres no possible excuse or justification for her coworker to keep complaining. When That Pain in Your Mouth Is a Salivary Stone, How Sinus Problems Can Affect Your Sex Life and What to Do About It, What to Know About Losing Your Sense of Smell and How It Relates to COVID-19, Chronic Rhinorrhea: 7 Surprising Causes of Constant Runny Nose, 6 Sore Throat Remedies That Actually Work. Its a hard balance to walk. Offensive even. Anyway, it is nice that you tried so hard with the changes you already made, and I hope that the scripts provided help your unappreciative coworker to back off. I was so sick that night. When youre a non smoker, its bad. And if this is how OP functions, what about the other coworkers? Even though a difficult or annoying coworker can really grind your gears, you should always control your emotions and refrain from losing your temper. Maybe its in the desk chair. It's a little passive aggressive but can't hurt. I also switch my perfume up pretty often, so its not like I have one scent that Im repeating every day. The only thing I can think of is that it was not washed as much as the other clothed. Find out which foods you should watch out for. I hope this works out and she backs off, but either way, as a scent-sitive person, thank you so much for going through all this effort. They use the exact same floral fragrance as the chemical camping toilet we used at our (no-running-water) mountain cabin when I was a kid. I get not wearing perfumes to work as requested and Im fine with that, but now youre asking me to go completely scent free at home too? Oh well then.if she just doesnt like it, thats just too bad. Or make sure youre using a powerful, unscented detergent. About 75% of Smelly Things gives me a headache, so I have a slight aversion as well. Maybe the hierarchy of OP compared to the coworker is part of this. Ive never complained, as I realized theres not much he can do to change it, so I resorted to using some (in my opinion) very mildly scented body lotion on my neck before I come in to work so I can smell that instead of him. Life is hard enough without complaining about the scents that dont try to kill me. The scent I was wearing the day she complained wasnt even actually patchouli, although I admit that I have loved the smell of patchouli since my ill-advised goth phase in high school. Here's how to tell if one or more of your coworkers are toxic: 1. Love the Smelly LW title! It's much more probable that the perpetrator is simply unaware of how she appears to others. +100 my workplace has those cans of Febreze in the bathroom and while I get the need for them, I do get that, its still awful and headache-inducing for me when someone sprays it. The jerkness indicator that leaps out at me is that she is still fixated on patchouli, which is a pretty distinctive smell. This feels to me very much like the OP is being singled out. She might be unwittingly attributing what she smells to you for the simple reason your scents bothered her. Theyre advertising is hilarious but humans have been emitting bathroom smells since well forever. Is your manager willing to get the company to pay for your shoes and chair to be professionally (and secentlessly) laundered? OK, you are unlikely to see this, but I *love* chicken. If this were me, I would tell coworker Ive done what I can and she can take it to the boss or HR if she feels more should be done. OP, I think the strongest scent I wear is from my shampoo/conditioner, and theyre as close to unscented as it can get. Seems like once someone gets a little of what they want, they feel comfortable asking for a little bit more. Thats my thought. Theyve done studies where a bunch of cotton balls are all scented with the same unscented lotion and then people rate and describe the smell of the different unnamed new scents that have different art with them. If so youve gone above & beyond & youre under no obligation to do more. I think this is an important point too. On a related note, my ex-boss smelled pretty strongly of second hand smoke. I supervise a manager who falsified an employee write-up but I dont think she should be fired, getting out of shared intern housing, why are so many executives condescending, and more, interviewer fake-rejected me to see if I would fight for the job. Still, no reason for Jane to be childish about it! Enough is enough. (Though I do still wonder what it takes to teach kids to chew with their mouths closed). Do you think you could calmly sit there for another 10 minutes and go into detail about what the smoke and fire will do to you?}. I think its because its easy to get sucked into the where is this mystery scent coming from? detective story. I have encountered commenters, here and on Corporette, who fully believe that scent free is the way to be, and that the world would be better if everyone cut scented products out of their lives. I am only saying this in the hopes that getting to the bottom of the issue will make it easier to figure out a solution. I cant even look at kale now, let alone consume it. She needs to figure out a way to disperse the smell at work (with a fan? Since then Ive tried to find ways to compensate for it without putting it off on people around me. Since I am one of those super sensitive people, I can say I have smelled things strongly that my friends and family cannot smell at all. I still cant eat creme brulee. We do not endorse non-Cleveland Clinic products or services. Oh, thats interesting! But more likely these coworkers are the only people left with improvements to make in this situation. I have spoken to my manager who has spoken to my coworker several times but . If its at the point where its only popping up twice over a few months, and your coworker is upset that you keep bringing it up because she feels shes addressed it, it seems like your coworker has done what she can and it would be a good idea not to bring it up with her anymore. Id ask the co-worker to describe the smell and when she smells it. I think a lot of people like the stuff you put on chicken; by itself, it doesnt taste like much. Policy. I still loved bourbon but I could not drink Jack for 20 years. Cleveland Clinic is a non-profit academic medical center. Vaguely mentioning allergies does not communicate the issue that someone has brought to you as her supervisor: that her constant sniffing is distracting her coworkers. it gives meme headaches and I carnt enjoy myself. The scent I was wearing suddenly started being unbearable right after I received a promotion. I agree to use Alisons wording and put this back in her court. Its very abnormal, trust no one, he may e ur broda's friend and may e younger than u, who knows whether he's older than u in spirit or devilish act. I cant go into a store that just had new carpet put down. Enlarged turbinates, structures in the nose that clean and humidify the air you breathe handy when theyre working well, not so much when they take up too much nasal real estate. The friend I was travelling with very kindly loaned me a clean T-short and knickers, which did not end well. Don't let on that you don't want to help, or you think she's stupid, since that's not helpful. But the coworker would probably then be encouraged in her delusions of scent. I havent used anything patchouli-scented in weeks/months/whatever! Your nose remembers stuff your brain just doesnt and makes huge amounts of connections. The best thing Ive ever found for bathroom sprays, which actually seems to cut through and dissipate unpleasant smells, is the citrus magic sprays that use actual lemon, lime, orange, and grapefruit oils. Single. I dont have a huge wardrobe, so most if not all of my office-appropriate clothes have been washed since then, so Im pretty sure that there are no lingering traces hanging on. Youve done more than most people would. Instead, offer practical solutions that can fix the solution for everyone. Anyone anymore advice? Or maybe the scents linger in a vehicle that then gets stuck on you, so to speak, or on an office chair? Ask your manager to move your desk if the faint scent of a lotion used the night before bothers you that much. Hes little and sneaks off and pees in low-traffic corners so its easy to miss. Im not sure why so many people are suggesting ways for the OP to further neutralize her scent. I don't think he would ever be unfaithful to me and I don't think he is guilty of anything other than getting to know his coworkers and being friendly. if there is a sensitivity at play here, it should be on the workplace to figure out an accommodation for the affected employeenot for OP to try even harder to obliterate every aromatic molecule from her clothes/jackets/chairs/PORES(?!!?? Since your coworker is making comments about patchouli, which has certain connotations, their excessive reaction feels, I dont know, prejudice or politicized almost? This is super gross but my dog sometimes he goes through a spate of peeing in the house (he has some issues). There have been loads of suggestions below for additional ways the letter-writer could tackle potential scents and stamp them out. The advice is spot on. They got washed by themselves. Fine. Its unreasonable of me to ask a coworker to adjust her perfume when shes not at work.). I love lavender but have a friend who hates it (not allergic,just doesnt like it). Whenever I'm within 20 metres of a sniffer, every sniff makes my whole body . That all said, if someone really has to try hard to smell things, then I fail to see how those scents could be so potent as to warrant the need to remove them. You've just arrived back at the office from a heavy lunch with your colleague, and from the other side of the cubicle, you hear him let out a loud, obnoxious burp. That is literally the worst of all worlds. Still cant eat red velvet after a stomach bug. It smells like unwashed bodies with bad b.o. Yeah, this was my thought. She requested I be moved. Here are 11 signs you're dealing with a toxic coworker. Bravo. Does that even matter though? I could not smell it at all but she certainly could. Making an employee constantly feel that they are the problem, shaming them for no real wrongdoing, or making them feel inadequate and unworthy. Its smells. Brownie batter? 15) She makes you feel special. Every time this happens I go through a spate of cleaning everything and thinking I smell pee ALL THE TIME. I would be very surprised if everyone in that office besides OP is living a committed scent-free lifestyle. my boyfriends manager told me I could date someone better, new CEO keeps talking about diet and exercise, coworker asks me to cover for him when hes not really off, and more. Lately I cant sit next to my wife at the dinner table at home without hearing her chew her food. I'm two hours into a four hour class with a girl who has a whole box of tissues but is still perpetually sucking snot into her throat. I add vinegar to thrift store clothes to get ride of the scented detergents most of them wash things in. Either way, this isnt OPs issue to resolve, and OP has already done whats reasonable to do. Policy. I will sometimes start to smell a certain scent that I associate heavily with a person when Im on the phone with him. Pause for a moment, look the colleague in the eye, and ask him in a calm and professional voice to repeat what he said. ! comment kinda looks like this coworker is looking for drama. I worked somewhere that used the lime one for the bathrooms and it did beautifully without giving me headaches, so I started buying them for home. I dont have any advice, but I am wondering how it is fair or reasonable that the OP should even have to make all of these concessions at her own expense because her coworker wont stop picking on her. Ideally, purchase some high-quality noise-canceling earphones and leave your desk. Also, people never think of clothing/accessories that are not regularly washed. And of course I shower daily. And I was laughed at. I thought he did it brilliantly well even though it was a tough thing. A physical change of environment for one or both of them should neutralise this co-workers issue. I posted this under Rhinitis because it's the closest thing I've found so far. Before I purchased the humidifier I googled it & found other was somy house won't be so dry. In other words, I tried steps 1-4 above, but was on my own to deal with this nut and couldnt get anything to work. There can be essential oils, plant derivatives, and masking fragrances in unscented products. I had a coworker who happened to have her desk right below one of the (old) building's AC vents, and she would sniffle / cough at least several times every single hour. If you have a sniffling toddler, youll definitely want to check that a blueberry or a bead didnt magically make its way up a nostril. Oils, especially, can seep into fabric and smell forever, even though you are no longer wearing scented products. My girlfriend know about me sniffing her shoes. She claimed I couldnt possibly smell it because it was only a drop on each foot and was covered, she couldnt smell it at all. That was me and popcornI worked at the concession counter of a movie theater as a teenager, and it took about five years to lose that powerful aversion to the smell of buttered popcorn. I used to prefer white wine to red. Thoughts?. The OP already did the reasonable thingsshe stopped wearing perfume and scented oils, she switched to mainly fragrance-free cleaning products, and as far as we know she doesnt even have anything around that smells like patchouli. Find out if your city is a top "allergy capital.". Take action to lessen the importance of your achievements or how you realized4 your accomplishments. If she says the smell is on your scarf, but you have a new scarf, then Id get a second opinion. I think OPs complainer is being kind of a jerk. I think the your fist, my nose boundary ends with how close you have to be to smell it and/or normal use. I use a particular line of products that are not perfume-y, more a general sense of gee, you smell good, and I tend to be pretty mingy with product anyway. . For instance, if you're on the phone with a customer, do not hang up on them as soon as they start cursing. If I were OP, Id be tempted to say, Patchouli? I dont get how it is different than a person who has to use a wheelchair or hearing aids. You can couch it as youd think itd be a good idea of someone checked up on him (and gently let him know that the noise is carrying). Agreed. A lot of times they put them on 12 hours ago for a night out and arent planning on taking a shower until after work the next day. Instead they want to continue chatting or working. I had a similar experience with norovirus and a bacon and Stilton jacket potato; it was years before I could look Stilton in the eye again! Therefore, I only bring it up to people if I cant avoid the person and just deal with it because I feel that I shouldnt dictate how others live their own lives. BINGO. I have a friend who I trade clothes with regularly when we get sick of stuff in our closet and I have to wash the clothes that come from her several times over before I can even stand to wear them, and several times over again before I cant smell it at all. Not only that, but it can also be a sign that your female coworker likes you but is hiding it. The exaggerated sniffing definitely sounds like she is just being a pain. Sadly, lots of people fall for this. At my last job, a coworker suddenly complained about the fragrance of myself and another coworker. Scent-free initiatives always seem so invasive to me. Or maybe its a combination of things that clashes to make a weird scent, like the OPs lemon body wash combined with the office bathroom air freshener. You are kind co-worker. I mentioned to my manager that I was cutting out the one thing I could think of that could be leaving a scent, and so far there hasnt been additional complaints (that I know of). Honestly, if my workplace required that I stop using scents on my body, I would have a big problem with it. And they find a way to deal with that.because they cant control it. (I did draw the line when someone started spraying their AquaNet on their hair at their desk, though..). Take AAMs suggestions to speak to Manager or to take it to HR and see what kind of reaction you get. They have to go out in public and buy groceries, get gas, go to the doctor, and basically interact with a whole plethora of other humans and nonhumans who all emit various smells. They should only be sniffing when you give them their release word (like "Break" or "Ok"). They say scent is our strongest memory, meaning that some smells immediately transport us to a specific person or place in time. spreading sexual rumors about an employee, or repeated hugs or other unwanted touching (such as a hand on an employee's back).
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